The Last Day Of Teal'c

[magnavox_23]

This one's for sg_wonderland who mentioned that region one missed out on this little gem too. This was available on the first disc from volume 5 on the season 8 dvds.

CJ walking to his trailer: "Good morning. It's the last morning. The last get up. After this, I'm unemployed.


Someone off camera: "Got any plans?"

CJ: "Looking for a job."

[CJ realises he's walked straight past his trailer]

CJ: "See? Quit bugging me. Now I've walked right past my room."

[People laugh off camera and CJ goes inside his trailer]


Steve Catlin: "I just went and got Chris Judge's order for breakfast. And it's egg whites, feta and chopped tomatoes. Isn't that exciting?

[Catlin knocks on CJ's door]

Steve Catlin: "He's not coming out. He's tired, the breakfast sucks, he's not coming out."

[CJ comes out of his trailer, waving his arm around as if trying to dissipate a bad smell.]


CJ: "I wouldn't go in there if i were you. Wow. Don't go in there."

[CJ goes into the makeup trailer]

CJ: "This may be the last time this process ever occurs again. And she rubs my breasts in the morning, too, and that's..."

[CJ laughs]

Jan Newman: " We start with a kiss and end with a kiss."


CJ: "Every morning for 8 years."

Jan Newman: " But he doesn't work every day so I kiss somebody else instead."

CJ: "She has to kiss frogs that day."

Jan newman: "Well, the prince is not here, is he?"

CJ: "Aw."

Jan Newman: " Well, on the very first day we did this, it took us 50 minutes to do. Because he had to have a very elaborate three piece tattoo put on and now we've managed to bring it down to about...normally, without the gold, probably more like 15 minutes, 20 minutes max. So I spend less time with him, and I hate that."


CJ: "As do I."

Jan Newman: "I've thoroughly enjoyed our mornings."

CJ: "Yeah. We used to have almost an hour every morning just by ourselves."

Jan Newman: "It's great. And we talk about absolutely everything."

CJ: "Mm-hm."

Jan Newman: "Absolutely everything."

[CJ winks at the camera and they both laugh]


Jan Newman: "What he did the night before, what he didn't do the night before."

CJ: "Keep in mind, sometimes my nights before just ended 5 minutes before."

Jan Newman: " That's true. he was sometimes a naughty boy. The only thing we haven't been able to get rid of is this darn tattoo. And this may be the last time ever that this tattoo goes on. And as a result of that, a brand new tattoo is going on today. The very best, the very last tattoo ever. This is the tricky part, to get Christopher to sit still."

CJ: " And that is the tricky part."




Jan Newman: " And here we just adjust it. Unsteady fingers. And that folks, is the last time Christopher Judge will get a kiss from me while he's getting his make up on."

[They kiss.]


Jan Newman: "Thankyou. Now, don't make me cry."

[CJ tries to compose himself]

Jan Newman: "No crying."


CJ: "No."

Jan Newman: "No crying."

CJ: "Thankyou Miss Jan."

[CJ waves to the camera.]

[CJ and MS walk to set. MS leaps at the camera and roars. CJ laughs.]


Someone off camera: "In your words, what are you wearing?"

CJ: "Bondage clothing."

MS: "Yeah don't...ask him to use somebody else's words."


CJ: "This is my dom outfit. Isn't it fab?"


Woman off camera: "So lovely working with you."

CJ: "I'm not used to skirts with anything underneath. I like the freedom. I like the dangle effect. isn't that a movie 'The Dangle Effect'?"

MS: "Oh god."


Man off camera: "What would you say have been the biggest differences from the first time you guys walked to set, what, 7 years ago, til now?"

CJ: "I'm sober."

MS: "He's sober."


[CJ points to Peter Williams.]

CJ: "Now there's an outfit. That's very good. His theme song is 'I Am What I Am."

Peter Williams: "Oh, Chris is way cool, man. He relaxes the set big time. And he throws all the best parties too."


CJ: "Or 'It's Raining Men'. I'm not sure which one."


CJ sings: "I am what I am..."

MS: "Yes, he is."


[CJ and MS rehearse the scene where Teal'c presents Apophis with Daniel.]

PW as Apophis: "Who are you?"

MS as Daniel: "Daniel Jackson. Um...can you maybe give me back my glasses?"

CJ as Teal'c: "He claims he is from the Tauri."

MS as Daniel: "You're not supposed to tell him."

PW as Apophis: "The Tauri have no Chaapa-ai."

MS as Daniel: "Oh. Well I guess I'm wrong. I'm sure your information is correct. The truth is, I'm wrong quite a bit. Quite unreliable. Actually I'm quite insane."

PW as Apophis: "Speak."

MS as Daniel: "Nothing else to say really."]


PW as Apophis: "Bring him."

MS as Daniel: "Oh! Ow!"

[CJ grabs MS rather roughly]

Someone off camera: "They used to be friends."

MS: "That's right motherfucker."

CJ: "Come on, man."

MS: "We're rehearsing dude."

CJ: "Don't put the cuff on."

MS: We're rehearsing."


CJ marches MS up the steps: "Down, bitch."


Man off camera: "Camera's running."

MS: "Sing for me."


PW as Apophis: "I think there is much you can tell me."

MS as Daniel: "If you wanna know about the sewers of Mesopotamia, I am quite an expert,"

[PW uses the Goa'uld hand device]

Man off camera: "And He's melting away, and three, two, one, toss him."

[MS throws himself on the ground.]


CJ as Teal'c: "This one is strong."

PW as Apophis: "Leave us."

[CJ steps away out of the scene. As he passs the camera, he waves his tongue at it.]


PW as Apophis: "You will tell me all that you know."

[PW uses the hand device again.]

Man off camera: "And he starts to fry you again. Ouch! And cut. Yes.

[MS is trying not to laugh.]


CJ: "That was pain? That was you in pain?"

MS: "I was in pain there."


CJ: "That sucked."


MS: "It was a rehearsal wasn't it?"

CJ (jokingly): "No."

MS: "Oh."

MS: "I'm glad I got my on set acting coach, Chris Judge. Show me expression number 2."


[Camera pans to CJ]


MS: "That was number 1, wasn't it? It's kinda like blue steel."


CJ: "That's black steel."

[someone suggests they go tighter on CJ's shot]

MS: "Why would we go tighter on Chris? Like we're gonna see anything more if we go tighter."

[CJ hides around a corner while Lynda Mills looks for him.]

Lynda Mills: "I'm looking for Peter and Chris."


Man off camera: "Chris went in."

[Lynda goes back inside.]

Man off camera: "She's looking for you. What are you doing here?"

CJ: "I'm hiding from Lynda (squeeky voice) I'm hiding from Lynda."


[Lynda comes out looking for CJ again and she walks straight past him.]

Lynda: "Where is he?"

[Lynda wanders around looking for CJ. She finally turns around to see him behind her. She laughs.]


Lynda: "There he is."

[CJ runs off back inside.]

Lynda: "Oh, get in there. Here comes Chris."

[Lynda taps CJ playfully on the shoulders.]


Lynda: "He was here a minute ago."

[CJ laughs.]

CJ: "And that's how we pass our days, here on Stargate, by tomfoolery."


Lynda: "What a guy."

[They set up to film the scene they just rehearsed. CJ cannot stop laughing.]


Director: "Action."

[CJ marches MS to the stairs roughly. Both completely overact the scene, then CJ looses it, and laughs.]


CJ: 'Oh, fuck, what am I doing?"

[CJ and MS walk around the standing sets.]

MS: 8 Years of working with this knob."

[Back to shooting the scene.]

Apophis: "Bring him."

[CJ again man handles MS.]

MS: "Oh, yeah."

CJ in a squeeky voice: "Pimpslap that bitch Apophis."


[They shoot the scene and CJ immediately acts composed. He walks towards the door to finish the scene.]

MS in a squeeky voice: "And keep walking!"

[Everyone laughs.]

MS: "Keep walking!"

Director: "Ok, that's a wrap."

[Montage of everyone hugging. CJ waves goodbye.]








Fin. ^_^